By Rebecca Drew
MEET the sex-positive man and woman with over 20K subscribers on YouTube who enjoy a fluid relationship bursting with unconfined love that they have shared with ‘quite a few’ other partners.
YouTubers Brittany Taylor (29) and Conor McMillen (33), from Rhode Island and California USA respectively, first met four years ago at a health festival in New York and were instantly drawn to each other, sharing a platonic relationship over nine months where love blossomed. The pair have been living together for three years now.
Brittany and Conor don’t like to label themselves as being in a polyamorous relationship, but do share intimate relationships with other people and choose to share their love openly with the world by practising unconfined love. They say that this has made their love for each other stronger than ever.
Brittany and Conor describe their relationships with other people as ‘fluid’ and have friends who they have shared sexual intimacy with and others they are close with, but they don’t share romantic intimacy with.
“We tend not to use labels as they often feel limited. However, as search terms, we’ve very much appreciated them, and we also know how taking on a word to represent a role we are embodying can be an empowering tool,” they said.
“Polyamory is defined as ‘the practice of or desire for intimate relationships with more than one partner, with the knowledge of all partners.
It has been described as ‘consensual, ethical, and responsible non-monogamy’ and we feel like this definition conveys elements of our relationship structure well.
“Unconfined love is a term we created that describes the life we aim to live. We choose to share our love openly with the world, in ways that feel right for us. We feel passionate about sharing this freedom, which feels like it goes beyond defining a certain type of relationship, and hits on the larger aim, which is to love without limit or restriction.
“We are two individuals, who love each other very much, and have no rules or template, which we are following for how we will relate with one another or how we will relate with others.
“We follow our hearts, always feeling out our truest desires, we check in with one another regularly, we are constantly growing and evolving, and falling more in love with each other and ourselves every day.
“Our relationships outside of ours are similar, in that they are unstructured, fluid, and constantly evolving. Each relationship is unique unto itself. We feel surrounded by a loving community who supports, and is also interested in having authentic, growing relationships.
“Yes, we find that all of the relationships in our lives enhance one another, and we feel they are doing the same for the lives of the other people we connect with.
“Our relationships are so fluid that a lot of people in our lives that could be considered friends, we have shared sexual intimacy or romantic relationships with.
“We have had relationships that range from short term to long term, we have partners we enjoy moving our bodies with while dancing or practising acrobatics, but do not share other intimacy with, we have shared lovers simultaneously with one another, we have had three-person relationships, and the list goes on.”
Both Brittany and Conor experienced jealousy before they met each other but they have learnt to understand it and use it to move forward, using it as a positive to improve their relationship.
The pair have plans to educate the world in sex positive relationships and they would like to have a child one day and say they get a lot of positive support from other people.
“We have both experienced quite a bit of jealousy, both before we began relating with one another, and since. We like to think of jealousy as something to understand, and to gain more data from, as opposed to something to deal with,” they said.
“Often when we are feeling jealous, we like to dive deeper into understanding the feelings that are coming up for us. Jealousy is just a word. What are the feelings underneath it? Usually it is some mixture of emotions and parts of us surfacing, such as fear, unworthiness, sadness, excitement, and so on.
“Often times we recognise the feeling of lack that may be coming up for us while thinking about the abundance we perceive the other person is having, is a desire to be experiencing our own abundance. Once we realise this, and as we uncover other deeper truths, we find that the initial ‘jealousy’ discomfort subsides, and more peace, presence, and understanding takes its place.
“We receive a lot of support. Especially at this point. Our world is so full of people, who are reaching out to us to thank us for what we share through our videos. There isn’t much room for scepticism.
“We imagine that us being so excited and passionate about our relationship, and that people can see and feel the genuine love we share with one another probably is a big part of it. People often ask if we get jealous. Some wonder if we have rules.
“Some ask us fun, intimate questions about our sex lives. Those are our favourite. A lot of people say they would like to try, but feel fearful about some element of it.”